About a Girl

Once upon a time there was a girl

A girl who dreamed of grandeur

A world beyond her circumstance

A place of peace and security

Absent of fear and doubt.

Filled with inspiration

Flowing with ideas

She wrote

And she wrote

And she wrote

Recording each delicious morsel

In anticipation for the next.

Notebook after notebook

Her words filled the pages

Until one day it was no longer enough

She wanted more

The urge to share her experiences with the world

So she started a blog

Hoping one day she may use these words to inspire

To encourage

To empower…

That day has finally come.

This once young and struggling writer, as of today, is now a published author.

Announcing the official release of….

Insane Roots – A Memoir: The Adventures of a Con-Artist and Her Daughter

Rochelle-InsaneRoots

In Stores Now!!!

 

 

Self Esteem is a B!t@h!

Why is it that I am so high-strung sometimes? I didn’t ask to be this way. I don’t like being this way. I am able to calm myself into an ordinary state quite quickly, but sometimes it just comes on without warning. My head starts spinning and it is as if I am drowning in my own subconscious. It’s like there is a Woodpecker on the back of my cranium.
I wish I could perceive myself through the eyes of others. All of the lines, the freckles, etc that I obsess over and fear judgment upon, would they fall away? Are they even there to begin with? Or is it that I just magnify their nuances to a much larger degree. If so, then why all the fuss. Why all waves of inferiority; this fear of judgment and malice.

Do grown (and I mean that in the strictest sense!) people really dislike someone because they have flaws on their face or their fashion sense is lacking? It sounds so silly to say, so why is so much of my time spent on the subject when I know it is not true.

I even tell myself I am being stupid, but that is just it, I am insulting myself. I should be encouraging myself and setting my goals much higher, instead of low on the assumption of failure.

What is the deal? There are so many people worse off than me and I am sure they aren’t terrified to attend any social gathering with strangers for fear of rejection. The most frustrating part is knowing how neurotic you are and not being able to stop critiquing every action you make! It is just exhausting! Does anyone else have this problem?
They must!

How do you stop it other that just telling yourself it is not true and surrounding yourself with faithful loving people?

After a while you start to come to grips with the issue and attack it head on! It becomes a bit of a challenge really and one of those high goals too! Sweet! Well, I guess I answered my own question!

This may be hell, but you can’t tell me we are not here to learn something! Although, school is kind of hellish! So I guess it would makes sense.

The brain is so complex! However if it were simple, we wouldn’t have the ability to study it!