“Forgiveness is the fragrance that the violet sheds on the heal that has crushed it.” – Mark Twain
Have you ever wished you were someone else or maybe just a more improved version of yourself? I can’t remember a time in my life when I didn’t and I am sure I am not alone.
And, I am sure we could sit here all day and argue about how one gets into that sort of mindset, but that will only invite more of the same self defeating vibration, so let’s not.
Instead, I want to know once and for all, how it is that one may break these patterns of thought and allow themselves to be content with their imperfections, ALL OF THEM!
There is a long list of things I don’t like about myself or wish I could do better, but after another episode of feeling uncomfortable in my own skin, it dawned on me that if I were only able to conquer the demon of self doubt and find acceptance of my full self, it would eliminate all these ill feelings I have about my physical appearance.
And wouldn’t that be an amazing existence…
I am tired of feeling like I am not thin enough or self conscious about the many other nuances that come with age.
I hold myself up to these absolutely unrealistic standards of what beauty is and as a result I continually feel like I am less than.
And enough is enough!
From now on, I am going to do my absolute best to try changing these patterns of thought.
And when asked what I would change about myself if I could? My reply will be to possess the ability to love myself just as I am.
I am not sure just how yet, but I have a feeling that trying to see myself through the eyes of my closest friends and family just may be the ticket.
When my boyfriend looks at me he doesn’t see what I see, not in the slightest. He loves me just as I am, as I do him.
It’s time I listen when he tells me I am beautiful and more importantly, it is time I start telling myself.
These days, I find great comfort in being alone.
In a world filled with monsters,
It all seems such a pointless charade.
One I no longer desire to fight.
Not for anyone,
I’ve no need for the notion,
That I’d ever be chosen.
For it will only end in pain.
And so, I find myself treasuring the dark,
This solitude, my security,
In this somewhat wicked story of my life.
Super excited to be doing another book signing and this time with two amazing women, Julie Wood & Susan Young!
Julie Wood is an author, teacher and national presenter on youth entrepreneurship. She has presented on entrepreneurship education, youth entrepreneurship, business operations, productivity and technology at local, regional and national conferences including: National Association of Small Business Development Centers, Chamber of Commerce events, Midwest Entrepreneurship Conference, WI State Training Conference, WI Transition Improvement Grant Conference. She has been hired to teach youth entrepreneur camps for kids ages 9-15 and has trained numerous teachers in basic entrepreneurship skills and the Biz Ops Game.
Susan Young runs the speaking and training company, Susan Young International. She works with people who want to harness the power of change to improve positivity, engagement, and communication.
And well, you all know me 🙂 – Tiffany Rochelle (- Bybee)
Thank you all for your support, it means the world to me. If you are in the Madison area, I hope to see you there!
Anger courses through my veins
As disappointment drips slowly down my face
The sadness is maddening
For I refuse to be broken
Not again, not this time.
I own this misconception
For it is mine alone
Acting against my better judgement
A familiar mistake
That always seems to leave me bruised.
I had hoped that this was different
That maybe, just once…
There was more to this life
Than simply existing
Perhaps it is valuable
This realization that nothing lasts forever
Life’s piercing reminder to appreciate those moments of pure vulnerability
For they are few and far between.
And growing less likely with every passing day.
Opening up, giving my all
Is not something I do easily
Nor an act I reserve for the common.
But even the exeptional
Have their doubts
Or so it would seem.
My defenses are rising
The walls rebuilding
In one last attempt to step away before it’s too late.
For I refuse to be broken
Not again, not this time.
Have you ever wished you were able to go back to a time in your past, not to change it, but simply to experience it again with all of the knowledge you now hold.
Moments you’ve forgotten and synchronicity you never understood.
One long winding road to the place you are now.
The person you have become.
Those twisted roots of history woven together to create your current reality.
How does it feel to know you chose this?
Every decision you have ever made has led to that which you are experiencing now.
Do you have any regrets…things you never said…and those you will never be able to say?
Has it taught you anything?
That time is fleeting.
And no one knows what tomorrow will bring…
It’s cold here, alone with my thoughts.
Drowning in doubt, from my mind’s fearful inquest.
Lonesome & drifting, as happiness fades to anguish.
I remember this feeling…
This longing, this worry
This terror that it will all go away.
I am trying to be brave, courageous
In the face of this affection.
I can feel myself shutting down, pulling back.
An all too familiar defense.
In the prevention of yet another broken heart.
The scars of the past have only just healed
Still dripping with the blood of a loved lost.
The pain is gone, but the memory of it remains.
And the knowledge that what I am facing, is so much greater than any devotion of the past.
Surely the loss of which could be something from which I may never recover.
For it is something, I have never wanted more.
Rugged, raw and pure.
To be seen for all that I am and admired still.