Collateral Damage

Callus was the heart of the man she tried to love.

Careless, the mind of a friend she tried to understand.

Broken was her spirit, the day he slipped away.

Not for the pain of losing love, but rather the reality that it was never really there.

Those neat little words, dripping ever so delicately from his tongue.

As the desire for truth overshadows its nonexistence.

Their many moments together, when the world would seem to fade away.

Are now just memories, she longs to forget.

The connection between them that she once felt was unmistakable,

She suddenly realized, was all in her head.

Perhaps foolishly, she thought their history meant something,

That she meant something, to him.

But now that time has passed and reflection taken hold,

All hope for him has faded into dust.

Those arms that once held comfort,

Hold nothing more than disappointment now.

And the piercing reminder, that he never really cared.

Not really, not for her.

It is all much clearer now.

She was merely a convenient relief for him, after a time of heartbreak and loss.

A familiar pleasure to pass the time.

Nothing more, than collateral damage, in his search for something better.

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Book Signing – 3/3/18 Madison, WI

Super excited to be doing another book signing and this time with two amazing women, Julie Wood & Susan Young!

Book Signing

Julie Wood is an author, teacher and national presenter on youth entrepreneurship. She has presented on entrepreneurship education, youth entrepreneurship, business operations, productivity and technology at local, regional and national conferences including: National Association of Small Business Development Centers, Chamber of Commerce events, Midwest Entrepreneurship Conference, WI State Training Conference, WI Transition Improvement Grant Conference. She has been hired to teach youth entrepreneur camps for kids ages 9-15 and has trained numerous teachers in basic entrepreneurship skills and the Biz Ops Game.

Eseedling.com

Susan Young runs the speaking and training company, Susan Young International. She works with people who want to harness the power of change to improve positivity, engagement, and communication.

SusanSpeaks.com

And well, you all know me 🙂 – Tiffany Rochelle (- Bybee)

InsaneRoots.com

Thank you all for your support, it means the world to me. If you are in the Madison area, I hope to see you there!

I Will Not Be Broken

Anger courses through my veins

As disappointment drips slowly down my face

The sadness is maddening

For I refuse to be broken

Not again, not this time.

I own this misconception

For it is mine alone

Acting against my better judgement

A familiar mistake

That always seems to leave me bruised.

I had hoped that this was different

That maybe, just once…

There was more to this life

Than simply existing

Alone.

Perhaps it is valuable

This realization that nothing lasts forever

Life’s piercing reminder to appreciate those moments of pure vulnerability

For they are few and far between.

And growing less likely with every passing day.

Opening up, giving my all

Is not something I do easily

Nor an act I reserve for the common.

But even the exeptional

Have their doubts

Or so it would seem.

My defenses are rising

The walls rebuilding

In one last attempt to step away before it’s too late.

For I refuse to be broken

Not again, not this time.

 

Have You Ever?

Have you ever wished you were able to go back to a time in your past, not to change it, but simply to experience it again with all of the knowledge you now hold.

Moments you’ve forgotten and synchronicity you never understood.

One long winding road to the place you are now.

The person you have become.

Those twisted roots of history woven together to create your current reality.

How does it feel to know you chose this?

Every decision you have ever made has led to that which you are experiencing now.

Do you have any regrets…things you never said…and those you will never be able to say?

Has it taught you anything?

Perhaps…

That time is fleeting.

And no one knows what tomorrow will bring…

 

 

Ms. Misunderstood

Lonely was the language of my heart.

So please forgive me when I don’t know what to say

How to act

Or how to play

With you.

I’m not used to being cared for

Understood

Or even wanted for that matter.

These feelings of affection & kindness

Frighten me

For I treasure them all too much

Craving them in the dark

Longing for them in the day.

I never thought I wanted this

But now…

I can’t think of anything

I’ve ever wanted more

Than you.

Inside Myself

It’s cold here, alone with my thoughts.

Drowning in doubt, from my mind’s fearful inquest.

Lonesome & drifting, as happiness fades to anguish.

I remember this feeling…

This longing, this worry

This terror that it will all go away.

I am trying to be brave, courageous

In the face of this affection.

I can feel myself shutting down, pulling back.

An all too familiar defense.

In the prevention of yet another broken heart.

The scars of the past have only just healed

Still dripping with the blood of a loved lost.

The pain is gone, but the memory of it remains.

And the knowledge that what I am facing, is so much greater than any devotion of the past.

Surely the loss of which could be something from which I may never recover.

For it is something, I have never wanted more.

Rugged, raw and pure.

To be seen for all that I am and admired still.

My Mistake

I  awoke today at 4 AM

Cringing at the prospect of another day

I am exhausted I thought

Lost

Wandering through the darkness of my mind

Sleep was my only peace

From this cloak of sanity I must abide

For I am cracked you see

Jagged

These edges on my heart

embraced with scars

From lovers of the past

Those who taught me

Just how worthless

One can make you feel

Thank you for reminding me that I mean nothing

For a moment, I actually thought you cared

My mistake